Break Up Mistakes To Avoid
Men and women are constantly testing each other subconsciously to see if they're a good choice for a long term relationship. You’ll find you can prove yourself worthy by avoiding these 10 deadly breakup mistakes.
MISTAKE 1- Begging, Pleading, Being Too Needy
After a breakup, many people make the biggest mistake of begging their ex to take them back. I know it seems like the right thing to do right after a breakup but in fact, it is the worst thing you can do at that time. Nobody wants to be with a needy person. Pleading and being needy is unattractive and is only going to push your ex further away from you. It will make them think their decision to break up with you was right.
MISTAKE 2- Trying To Persuade Your Ex To Come Back With Logic
You cannot argue or logically persuade your way back into a relationship. You can’t convince a person to like you, love you or want to be with you. Emotions don’t work that way.
MISTAKE 3- Playing The Role Of Human Doormat
The Doormat Syndrome in relationships is going out of your way and sacrificing your own happiness to please your partner. It means accepting everything that your partner wants you to do without having any demands of your own, just to get back with them. If you find yourself saying things like, “Please stay" or "I will do anything for you” then you may be suffering from this syndrome.
Don’t do it because:
It’s unattractive and your partner’s respect for you will be lost as nobody is attracted to someone who doesn’t have their own opinion, needs, or their hobbies.
Even if you do get your ex back like this, you'll have an unhappy clingy relationship which probably won’t last very long.
MISTAKE 4- Showering Your Ex With Flowers And Gifts
Flowers and gifts are best used to say “Thank You” or “I Love You” but does nothing to help a broken relationship. Basically, it tells your ex you don’t believe you’re good enough to be taken back on your own merits.
MISTAKE 5- Smothering them with affection
It is logical to assume that if your ex knows how much you care for them and love them, they’ll come back. However, smothering your ex with affection right now is not romantic. Your guilty feelings may, in fact, be the very thing that pushed your ex away to begin with.
MISTAKE 6- Missing The Whole Point Of Chemistry
Men and women are attracted to different things. You can’t use the same tactics that would work on you to woo a person of the opposite sex. For example, men are mainly attracted to a woman’s appearance while women are attracted to personality. This means you need to make an effort to work on just being yourself.
MISTAKE 7- Giving Your Ex-All Your Power
At this point, even if it was your ex who broke up with you, you don’t want to give them all the power. You don’t want to be the one who is always available to them. You don’t want to be their contingency plan. Acting like your life is over without your ex will only lose their respect for you. In the history of breakups, no one has ever taken their ex back out of pity.
MISTAKE 8- The Looks And Money Trap
Looks and money are not the foundations of a lasting relationship, especially after you’ve been involved in a close relationship with the person. Some people make the mistake of thinking a drastic change in appearance will win their partner back.
MISTAKE 9- Freaking out when your Ex Starts Seeing Someone Else
After a breakup, you feel depressed, angry confused, shattered, and are really hurting. At this point, if your ex starts seeing someone else, it just tears you apart. Rebound relationships happen after a breakup, it’s very normal. But the good news is that they don’t last. Sometimes, they start seeing someone else just to rub it in your face. In this situation just be cool about it. Act indifferent to their new relationship and just concentrate on your own life.
MISTAKE 10- Not Getting HELP
After a painful breakup, it’s a hard time for anyone to know what to do. But there is a right and a wrong way to try and win your ex back. It makes some people uncomfortable but if you take the time to learn some things about spirituality, and people’s needs and desires you can regain control of yourself and possibly draw your partner’s heart back to yours.