Hello Mr. Lovelace-

My name is Alex. I am a sophomore in high school and haven't dated much in the past, but recently I've started to date more. Not as much as my friends though. My problem is that I always seem to run the girl off. My friends say it is because I get too "deep" too fast and I do kinda let my thoughts run wild. Like If I really like the girl, I start to wonder about all sorts of things and make myself really nervous. I do think a lot. My friends always tell me this is a problem, but I can't help it. Any thoughts on my situation would be gladly welcomed.

Just kinda here,


Hi Alex-

First of all, I doubt you're "just kinda here." I'm positive you have lots of amazing things to offer this world and those lucky enough to have an encounter with you. That said, I wonder if the phrase "you think too much" sounds familiar? This was something I was told all the time as a child growing up. And frankly, people still tell me this every now and again. Looking back, I realized that at first I thought nothing of it. Nothing at all. That was probably when, unbeknownst to me, my subconscious began forming my "I'm not good enough" perception of myself which still rears its ugly head today.

Then somewhere along the way, I started to believe just that, and its effects on me really sunk their teeth in. But then amazingly, as an adult, one day my mother said it to me again. That's when I realized something absolutely incredible! I realized in that moment that I don't "think too much." This is just the way my brain is wired. Do I hold on to details and analyze every little piece of whatever? YEEES, I do. But this is because I find it interesting, or because I am attempting to gain a better or clearer understanding of whatever it is. This is how "I" do it. Now I must admit, being as I am a "gut" person and emotionally driven, I can think myself into a tailspin sometimes. As for me feeling as if I shouldn’t THINK as much about things or that I should see my "thinking too much" as a defect...CRAP!!!

I said all THAT to say this...keep being you! I guarantee you’ll figure out how to gauge this "thinking into things" issue, and one day you’ll view it as a non-issue and more for what it really is.... A Huge Plus.....Keep being yourself!

Best regards,

Theodore Lovelace



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